BlogPodium wrapped up and it was Oscar's birthday morning. He was so excited to have balloons waiting for him in the kitchen and he kept pulling on the strings making them bounce against the ceiling. Apart from his excitement in this photo, do you notice anything else? Take a peek at the banner.
I hadn't noticed the error on his birthday banner until later on that day. I remember initially laughing at my mistake but then quickly feeling deflated because I hadn't notice the obvious spelling mistake. I was exhausted from burning the candle at both ends for a very long time. For the past 4 months I was also mourning the loss of my Dad, running after an active two year old and running multiple businesses. It was the first moment where I realized things were catching up with me. And I obviously needed a break.
Thankfully a few days after this photo was taken I moved to my Mom's as the kitchen renovation was starting. It was a welcomed move as I adore my family. Even being in the peaceful surroundings of my family home with my family, I still felt like my nerves were shot. I had a tearful night while living with Mom where I realized I was stressed and I realized that life got a little off track.
Have you ever had moments where you've realized that you may not be leading the life you want to lead? It could be as simple as realizing you have a condo in the heart of the city and one day you realize - you've always wanted to live in a small town where you have a small house with no neighbours. But that job that you took temporarily 5 years ago just brought you down this path of city living. It just happened. Somethings just happen and life takes us down these paths and before you know it we've forgotten about our orginal intent and passions. Until we have moments where kind of wake up. That was my moment at my Mom's. So I made these changes.
1. Choose my work wisely.
The most difficult decision out of all was that I resigned from running BlogPodium. It was hard because I wasn't resigning because I didn't love it, or working with Jennifer - I was resigning because in conjunction with running The Penny Paper Co. it was all too much. Sometimes we have to evaluate what we want as a career path - and for me it was running my shop. Although I'm ridiculously proud of having founded this conference, and running it with Jen - The Penny Paper Co. is where my heart is and it deserves my entire attention.
In the last 6 months, I don't think I had spent a night with Aubrey relaxing. I'd eat dinner with him, and then go back to my office to work until 1 or 2 in the morning. That work/life balance was totally out of whack and not healthy. So that needed to change. Since moving home from my Mom's, we've been hanging out more, which has made me much happier. :) I'm also asking family to come watch Oscar for a few hours here and there - which allows Aubrey and I to get out together. I'll confess - I'm an anxious Mom so I'm not ready yet for a babysitter other than family. But slowly I'm making strides in leaving Oscar which allows Aubrey and I to go on date nights [Photos above of us going to an iYellow Wine Club event at West Elm last week] Yay for date nights.
3. Join a Gym.
With stress, I eat. With the passing of my Dad I think I could curl up in bed and eat a box full of cookies. I know it's my weakness because I've been doing it since he passed. So I've decided I need to get out, and work off that stress at a gym. Aubrey and I found a club we both love, and we're joining in September. I'm really excited.
I realize this is a personal post - something I'm a little reluctant to share. But I'd like to think that it's healthy to share this kind of life lesson with others - that we can stop, and evaluate our priorities. Since making my changes above I've felt a wave of peace. My anxiety left, my happiness returned, and I feel back in control of my life. Now my life changes may not be what you would do - but I think we all I think have to make sure we're living lives that are what we want. Don't you agree? Have you ever had moments in life like this?